samedi 28 mars 2015

Vs 52 portraits || 13

 
Food and I - part 2
 
 
Yes, those words. They all have been said to me at one point or another in my life, some by my own parents, some by myself. Eating disorders are not about being thin. They are about control. About trying to have some form of control when you feel that you have none. It is easier to control your food intake than to get to the root of that performance anxiety. It's easier to throw up those feelings of insecurity than to address the situation that makes you feel this way. It's easier to feel those physical pangs than to admit you are not perfect.
 
Just like I feel that I am a smoker who doesn't smoke, I live with these misperceptions of my own body. I always say that I am a pendulum, swinging between feeling good about how I look to utter discouragement and devastation. There is no middle ground. I am wiser now and I understand my triggers, the people who sabotage me and, most of the time, I am able to talk down that inner voice. But those words, the feelings they stir, those stay with me always.
 
 
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If you are interested, these art journals address this issue :
 
 
 

2 commentaires:

  1. Im like a broke record. So again. You are killing it with these. I loved how you described it as a pendulum and said that its about control. You are so right. Like everyone, I have had to come to terms with how me being comfortable with how I look and being ok with the fact that others are not ok with it. Its such a hard thing to combat and I LOVE that you are speaking to it so boldly. So Thank you friend.

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    1. Thank you, Lauren, for your words. For writing them down. I have received many beautiful but hard stories after I shared this picture and I am glad it has struck a chord with people.

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